the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
My Sexting was not on an AP level
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
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