eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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