She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize