you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
love makes seman taste better
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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