if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize