How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
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