I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize