I feel like abortions should bother me more
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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