I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
Did I show you my penis last night?
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I am available for nakedness
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
Randomize