Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
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i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
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The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
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