I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize