I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
He has the fingertips of a God
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize