my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
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