she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
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