Plan B is the new Plan A
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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