Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
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