I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
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Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
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Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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