You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
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