Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize