:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize