ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
YAS. BRING CRAB.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize