Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no you cant smoke seaweed
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
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