atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Randomize
