Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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