Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
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Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
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My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
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