did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
whose ass print is on the piano?
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
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