there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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