What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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