i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize