What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize