farters have to be the big spoon...
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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