I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
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