Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize