Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
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