You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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