i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
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