I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
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