Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Randomize