Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
tell your sister to shave her snatch
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
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