Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Randomize