she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Randomize