Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
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