i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
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