apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
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your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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