I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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