thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize