So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
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