so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize