absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
Randomize