God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
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